2. A few words at the beginning

Do you know the Choice Theory®? It was developed by William Glasser. Choice Theory assumes that each person has only the power to control himself and only limited power to control others.

Why does it start with power and control? And then about controlling others? It is almost a consolation that according to this theory it seems to be quite difficult to control others!

As you will see in a moment, it is about empowerment, about being able to make a difference (hopefully positive) for oneself and for others. And Glasser thinks that it is only possible to a limited extent that we can change other people. They have to do it themselves!

Glasser wanted to support people in taking responsibility for their own lives.

We are currently experiencing a time of tremendous social upheaval. Wars and their effects are shaking our continent. People have to leave their homes and are dependent on the help of others. Steadily advancing inflation is putting more and more people in trouble. Existences are threatened. Many people no longer know how to finance their lives: Rents are rising, energy costs are exploding, and food is becoming more expensive. And our society is divided. The effects brought about by the measures to contain the Corona pandemic are unmistakable: Our society is divided into two factions and there is little willingness on either side to reach out to each other and seek common solutions. And the advancing climate change on the one hand shows us our powerlessness and on the other hand gives us an idea of the drastic measures that have to be taken in order to survive as humanity on this planet.

All these events and developments pose great challenges to us as a society. Our democratic coexistence is being put to the test. How do we deal with each other when we ourselves feel threatened, when we are deeply insecure?

What about responsibility? What decisions must finally be taken? And how can we actively live the values of democracy, especially in times of great challenges? How can we make decisions together that are good for the common good? And more importantly, how do we have to act to protect our planet with all its creatures?

And can we learn from history? Looking back does not exactly make us confident about the future! Our democracy in Europe is still quite young. But if we look at historical developments, we must inevitably come to the point that times of great deprivation, times of great poverty and hardship have not necessarily been conducive to human coexistence. The inconceivably horrific atrocities and crimes committed on a daily basis during the Nazi regime cost the lives of 6 million people!

You are a teacher. You work with our children. What perspectives can we give our children? How should they be able to look to the future with confidence in the face of threatening circumstances? What can we give them? Isn't it much more the case that it is above all young people who show us "old people" that it is high time to take responsibility? So what can we offer young people that will support them in making good decisions? And what is a good decision anyway?

If, in the face of this urgent situation, we can only control ourselves and have only limited possibilities to do so with others, the topic of "feeling responsible for one's own thoughts and actions" becomes even more central and important. Because: We will only succeed together, i.e. if as many people as possible take full responsibility for themselves and their actions.

Now, you may of course object that it is very much possible to control other people. Due to increasing digitalisation, the surveillance of people by other people and especially by programmed algorithms is also progressing. There are now a large number of international corporations doing big business with our data.

Is this a contradiction to William Glasser and his statement that we have limited power to control others?

As we understand William Glasser, the point is that we don't have to wait, and certainly must not wait, for others to change so that we (can) change ourselves. We don't have much room for manoeuvre there. The current division in society regarding the Corona measures clearly shows us that sides, those in favour of the measures and those against them, have only very limited possibilities to influence the attitudes and thus the behaviour of others, let alone to change them.

And yet, especially now, when it comes to making sustainable changes as a society, we need as much cooperation as possible from all of us, based on deep empathy for our own needs and those of our fellow human beings.

Why do needs come up here?

At this point, let's let Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of Nonviolent Communication, have his say:

It will take a lot of motivation from all of us to make this social change work. And if we can believe Mr Rosenberg - and we believe we should - then the issue of motivation (everything we do) is very much about our needs.

You are a teacher and we are very glad that you are reading this booklet. You work with our children every day. You can give a lot to our children. In addition to all the knowledge you impart to our children, it is also very important that you give our children the following: Confidence. Confidence that together we can make it!

If we succeed in getting as many of us as possible to take responsibility, this will inevitably lead to us beginning to behave in a more sustainable way, to us having more positive relationships and generally being more satisfied with our lives.

In doing so, we can and should also help each other. And this is our understanding of democracy.

And this brings us back to the Choice Theory mentioned at the beginning, which we will introduce in more detail in the coming chapters. Choice Theory can be used to help our children lead more responsible and conscious lives. This theory is also about the topic of needs, which are, after all, the driving force behind our motivation.

And it is about the fact that we have a choice to decide. An important question here is: What is the best strategy to get what I really want for myself and my fellow human beings and our planet with its numerous living beings?

If we pay attention to our needs and make sure that we fulfil them responsibly, could this help us to give up superficial comforts and to support meaningful measures in the longer term?

Let us find out together on the following pages!